Alien Collective Read online

  Raves for the Alien novels:

  “For those craving futuristic high-jinks and gripping adventure, Koch is an absolute master!”

  —RT Book Reviews (top pick)

  “Koch still pulls the neat trick of quietly weaving in plot threads that go unrecognized until they start tying together—or snapping. This is a hyperspeed-paced addition to a series that shows no signs of slowing down.”

  —Publishers Weekly

  “Aliens, danger, and romance make this a fast-paced, wittily-written sf romantic comedy.”

  —Library Journal

  “Gini Koch’s Kitty Katt series is a great example of the lighter side of science fiction. Told with clever wit and non-stop pacing . . . it blends diplomacy, action and sense of humor into a memorable reading experience.”

  —Kirkus

  “The action is nonstop, the snark flies fast and furious. . . . Another fantastic addition to an imaginative series!”

  —Night Owl Sci-Fi (top pick)

  “Ms. Koch has carved a unique niche for herself in the sci-fi-romance category with this series. My only hope is that it lasts for a very long time.”

  —Fresh Fiction

  “This delightful romp has many interesting twists and turns as it glances at racism, politics, and religion en route . . . will have fanciers of cinematic sf parodies referencing Men in Black, Ghost Busters, and X-Men.”

  —Booklist (starred review)

  “Gini Koch mixes up the sometimes staid niche of science fiction romance by adding nonstop humor, blockbuster action, and moments worthy of a soap opera.”

  —Dirty Sexy Books

  DAW Books Presents GINI KOCH’s

  Alien Novels:

  TOUCHED BY AN ALIEN

  ALIEN TANGO

  ALIEN IN THE FAMILY

  ALIEN PROLIFERATION

  ALIEN DIPLOMACY

  ALIEN VS. ALIEN

  ALIEN IN THE HOUSE

  ALIEN RESEARCH

  ALIEN COLLECTIVE

  UNIVERSAL ALIEN

  (Coming in December 2014)

  Copyright © 2014 by Jeanne Cook.

  All Rights Reserved.

  Cover art by Daniel Dos Santos.

  Cover design by G-Force Design.

  DAW Book Collectors No. 1651.

  DAW Books are distributed by Penguin Group (USA).

  All characters and events in this book are fictitious.

  Any resemblance to persons living or dead is strictly coincidental.

  If you purchased this book without a cover you should be aware that this book may have been stolen property and reported as “unsold and destroyed” to the publisher. In such case neither the author nor the publisher has received any payment for this “stripped book.”

  The scanning, uploading and distribution of this book via the Internet or via any other means without the permission of the publisher is illegal, and punishable by law. Please purchase only authorized electronic editions, and do not participate in or encourage the electronic piracy of copyrighted materials. Your support of the author’s rights is appreciated.

  Nearly all the designs and trade names in this book are registered trademarks. All that are still in commercial use are protected by United States and international trademark law.

  eBook ISBN 978-1-101-63569-8

  DAW TRADEMARK REGISTERED U.S. PAT. AND TM. OFF. AND FOREIGN COUNTRIES —MARCA REGISTRADA HECHO EN U.S.A.

  Version_1

  CONTENTS

  Raves for the Alien novels

  Books by Gini Koch’s

  Title Page

  Copyright

  Dedication

  Acknowledgments

  CHAPTER 1

  CHAPTER 2

  CHAPTER 3

  CHAPTER 4

  CHAPTER 5

  CHAPTER 6

  CHAPTER 7

  CHAPTER 8

  CHAPTER 9

  CHAPTER 10

  CHAPTER 11

  CHAPTER 12

  CHAPTER 13

  CHAPTER 14

  CHAPTER 15

  CHAPTER 16

  CHAPTER 17

  CHAPTER 18

  CHAPTER 19

  CHAPTER 20

  CHAPTER 21

  CHAPTER 22

  CHAPTER 23

  CHAPTER 24

  CHAPTER 25

  CHAPTER 26

  CHAPTER 27

  CHAPTER 28

  CHAPTER 29

  CHAPTER 30

  CHAPTER 31

  CHAPTER 32

  CHAPTER 33

  CHAPTER 34

  CHAPTER 35

  CHAPTER 36

  CHAPTER 37

  CHAPTER 38

  CHAPTER 39

  CHAPTER 40

  CHAPTER 41

  CHAPTER 42

  CHAPTER 43

  CHAPTER 44

  CHAPTER 45

  CHAPTER 46

  CHAPTER 47

  CHAPTER 48

  CHAPTER 49

  CHAPTER 50

  CHAPTER 51

  CHAPTER 52

  CHAPTER 53

  CHAPTER 54

  CHAPTER 55

  CHAPTER 56

  CHAPTER 57

  CHAPTER 58

  CHAPTER 59

  CHAPTER 60

  CHAPTER 61

  CHAPTER 62

  CHAPTER 63

  CHAPTER 64

  CHAPTER 65

  CHAPTER 66

  CHAPTER 67

  CHAPTER 68

  CHAPTER 69

  CHAPTER 70

  CHAPTER 71

  CHAPTER 72

  CHAPTER 73

  CHAPTER 74

  CHAPTER 75

  CHAPTER 76

  CHAPTER 77

  CHAPTER 78

  CHAPTER 79

  CHAPTER 80

  CHAPTER 81

  CHAPTER 82

  CHAPTER 83

  CHAPTER 84

  CHAPTER 85

  CHAPTER 86

  CHAPTER 87

  CHAPTER 88

  CHAPTER 89

  CHAPTER 90

  CHAPTER 91

  CHAPTER 92

  THE FIRST TUESDAY IN NOVEMBER

  Excerpt from Universal Alien

  For Colette Chmiel and Joseph Gaxiola, whose help and support has been and remains invaluable to my career and my sanity.

  ACKNOWLEDGMENTS

  As always, I must thank, first and foremost, my awesome, supportive, and incredibly patient editor, Sheila Gilbert; my wonderful agent, Cherry Weiner; my fantastic crit partner, Lisa Dovichi; and my main beta reader, Mary Fiore. Not only for all their help, but also for putting up with me and a host of neuroses throughout the writing of this book. Special thanks to my daughter, Veronica, who spent an inordinate amount of time reassuring me that the book was indeed good, and doing other things that I’m sure she’ll make me pay for later in life.

  Love and thanks always to all the good folks at DAW Books and Penguin for support and patience (yes, lots of patience was given to me for this book, for which I’m incredibly grateful). Even more love and thanks to all my fans around the globe, my Hook Me Up! Gang, members of Team Gini, all Alien Collective Members in Very Good Standing, Twitter followers, Facebook fans and friends, Pinterest followers, and all the wonderful fans who come to my various book signings and conference panels—you’re all the best and I wouldn’t want to do this without each and every one of you along for the ride.

  Special shout outs to: my distance assistant, Colette Chmiel, who continues to ensure that I know what I’m doing when while also keeping the pirates at bay; my personal assistant, Joseph Gaxiola, who continues to ensure that I show up when and where I’m supposed to, who keeps me calm and laughing on the road, and who frequently allows me to be two places at once; Edward Pulley,
for letting me steal Joseph away so much and for always helping out whenever I need it, which is often; Adrian and Lisa Payne, Hal and Dee Astell, and Duncan and Andrea Rittschof, who continue to bring their smiling faces to every event I attend, ensuring that I always feel loved and supported; Jan Robinson for continuing to make adorable pieces of “soft artwork” related to all my books and then bestowing them on me time and time again; Robert Palsma, for continuing to like everything I do; Kay Johnson, for constant cheerleading; Lee Greenberg and Rachel Warner for all the fantastic foodie experiences and even better company at WorldCon San Antonio; authors Leo King and Thomas Olde Heuvelt for a great time talking the night away at WorldCon San Antonio; Tom and Libby for the best fudge in the world; Oliver and Blanca Bernal for always having a welcoming home; Missy “Whoosh” Katano, Colette “Sunny” Chmiel, Paul “Catman” Sparks, and my Montana Girls, Terry Lopez and Betty Russell for coming from far away to spend time with me at DarkCon; special thanks to Missy Katano for all the lovely prezzies and Betty Russell for giving me the greatest compliment anyone can—love you both; Brad “My Man” Jensen for great help at DarkCon; my Paranormal Romance Dream Team pals, authors Caris Roane, Erin Kellison, and Erin Quinn for laughs, advice, and solidarity; my Wyked Women Who Write friends, authors Jordan Summers, T.M. Williams, Sharon Skinner, T.L. Smith, and Marsheila Rockwell for fun times at cons and while eating cupcakes; Mysterious Galaxy San Diego, Mysterious Galaxy Redondo Beach, and The Poisoned Pen Scottsdale for support at cons, events, and book signings; and awesome author L.E. Modisett, Jr., who tells the best stories, for invaluable advice and encouragement.

  And, as always, all my love and thanks to my husband, Steve, and daughter, Veronica. No writer could have a better family than I do and I love you both more than words can say.

  THERE WAS A TIME, about four and a half years ago, when I thought the world was basically simple.

  I was a single, carefree girl with a sorta-promising career in marketing, great parents, good friends, and a place of my own.

  Then a superbeing formed in front of me and genetics I didn’t know I had took over. I killed the fugly monster, saved the day, and won the heart of the handsome prince. Literally.

  Of course, my prince didn’t know he was a prince, though he did know he was an alien, even though he was born on Earth. His family was exiled from Alpha Four in the Alpha Centauri system. His very large, extended, and connected-back-through-the-ages family. All of whom are pretty much the most gorgeous people on Earth. Since they also have two hearts, hyperspeed, the ability to regenerate and heal quickly, and special talents, the fact that they’re also great looking sort of seems unfair.

  It is unfair, really. But I manage to find the will to go on.

  I also discovered a much more promising career in the realm of Superbeing Extermination, and moved quickly up the ranks to become the Head of Airborne for Centaurion Division. And, just as quickly, got moved over to become first the co- and then the only Ambassador for American Centaurion. Though I’ve protested a lot about the Peter Principle, everyone insists I’m at least as good at this job as I was at any other. They’re being complimentary. I think.

  Jeff’s in the same spaceship, of course, because he got shoved into being the Representative for New Mexico’s 2nd District in Congress. Meaning he has to work with politicians every day. And to set the rumors straight, not all politicians are evil monsters, but most of them make us nostalgic for the superbeings we used to fight regularly.

  There are plenty of nights where we argue about which one of us has the worse job. But at least we have each other.

  And we have our daughter, Jamie, who’s very special with a heaping side of extra. In addition to her being a human-alien hybrid, some extenuating circumstances have led to her sharing head space with a collective superconsciousness. At two and a half, that’s probably a lot to handle, but she’s our daughter and she’s doing great with it. Overachieving is apparently our “thing.”

  So, you know, fantastic husband, amazing daughter, important jobs we feel challenged in, great friends, wonderful family. What could go wrong with all of that?

  • • •

  Wow. You really haven’t been paying attention all this time, have you?

  CHAPTER 1

  “YOU HAVE THE RIGHT to remain silent. Anything you say can and will be used against you in a court of law.”

  “I’d like to say two words—Diplomatic Immunity. Then I’d like to say other words like, I want to call my lawyer, the President, my mom, and a few other people like Officer Melville.” The cop helped me up into the paddy wagon.

  “That’s nice.” Of course, he was now actually helping my lawyer into the big metal van. Amy Gaultier-White patted my hand. “You and all the rest get to go to headquarters first, ma’am. Then you can make all those calls you want to make.”

  “Diplomatic Immunity. We do remember what that means?”

  The cop smiled as he helped several other women into the paddy wagon with me. “Yes, ma’am, Ambassador Katt-Martini. We do know.”

  “I’m the Ambassador for the American Centaurion Diplomatic Mission. My husband is a congressman. And you’re risking pissing off a lot of important people.”

  “Comes with the job, ma’am.”

  “Why are we being arrested? Since when is arresting diplomats your job? Every woman with me is part of my diplomatic mission.” In some way, at any rate. Wasn’t sure if I could count the female members of Alpha Team as being part of the Embassy staff. Then again, I was the Ambassador, so I could decide I’d officially instated them as Disturbance Attachés before we left. Minor moral dilemma solved. Major dilemma still not solved.

  “You’re at the scene of a disturbance, ma’am. Ambassador or not.”

  “I’ll say it again, officer—Diplomatic Immunity.”

  “Yes, ma’am.” The cop gave me the Concerned Officer of the Law look. “You’re being moved off the streets for your own protection, ladies.”

  “Peaceful protest is part of our democracy,” Abigail said.

  “My husband’s going to hear about this,” Serene added. “He’s an astronaut.”

  “I’ll watch out for falling moon rocks, ma’am,” the cop said to her. Wasn’t positive, but I was pretty sure he was trying really hard not to laugh. “However, your own protection currently supersedes your immunity.”

  “Since when?” Amy asked.

  “Since now.” The cop closed the back doors. Nicely. But still.

  “Well,” Lorraine said, “at least we’re not chained up or handcuffed.”

  “Speak for yourself,” Claudia muttered.

  “You tried to hit one of the officers in the face,” Lorraine pointed out.

  “He was being rude.” Claudia looked around. “Can I get out of these now?”

  “Sure. You want to break them or have me or Amy pick the lock?”

  Lorraine Billings, Claudia Muir, Serene Dwyer, and Abigail Gower were all female A-Cs, or, as I called them to myself, Dazzlers. Dazzlers were, to a one, gorgeous, which was par for the A-C’s course. They were also all brilliant by human standards, usually focused on medicine, math, and/or science. My girls were also focused on butt kicking.

  They all looked awed and impressed. “You and Amy have finally learned to pick locks?” Serene asked.

  Amy and I both sighed. “Yes, Malcolm’s been working on it with us,” I shared.

  “A lot,” Amy added, going for the Full Disclosure option.

  Malcolm Buchanan was assigned to be my personal shadow. He was also pretty much the most comprehensively competent dude in covert and clandestine ops imaginable. During Operation Infiltration he’d taught the four Dazzlers with us in the paddy wagon how to pick locks. Amy and I hadn’t done so well with that. So Buchanan had made it a point to ensure that we knew how. Sadly, it hadn’t come that easily to either one of us, which was something of an embarrassment, but both Amy and I were proficient lock pickers now.

  Amy pulled a metal nail file out
of her purse. “Too slow, Kitty.” She went to work.

  “At least some of us made it,” Claudia said as Amy got the cuffs off her and she rubbed her wrists.

  The doors opened again and two more women were put in—Doreen Weisman, our last Dazzler on Embassy Duty, and Denise Lewis, who was human but frankly gorgeous enough to pass for alien.

  “Diplomatic Immunity!” Doreen shouted. “Do you all understand what that term means?”

  The cops smiled, nodded, and shut the doors again. “So much for Claudia’s optimism,” I said. “I thought you two had gotten away.”